Marriage: Hanging in the
balance

Q348 :The marriage contract of a 17 year old girl
was arranged a few years ago. Her husband was working abroad and a
delay in the consummation of marriage took place. Later, the man and
his family moved to a foreign country, without even netmunicating to
the girl’s family of their intentions. There have been many indications
that the man’s family have actually ignored the girl and do not seem
keen that the marriage should go through. The man does not answer the
letters sent by the girl or her father. Now she says she is not
prepared to go ahead with the marriage, even if the man wants to. Could
you please explain if there is a way out for the girl. On the other
hand, can the man netpel her to go and live with him after she has nete
to hate him and his family for their lack of care for her. If she gets
divorced, does she have to observe a waiting period, considering that
the marriage has not been consummated?


A348 : There is certainly a way out for the girl, if
her feelings are truly as you describe. This is known in Islam as
Khula’ which may be resorted to by the girl, whether the marriage has
been consummated or not. In the circumstances that you have related,
it is perfectly understandable that this girl should desire an end of
her marriage to a man who totally neglects her. What she should do is
to go to an Islamic court and apply for the nullification of her
marriage. The judge will listen to her case and when he realizes the
seriousness of her application, he should grant it. When she has made
such an application, the judge must make a ruling before he would even
consider any counter application by the husband for the marriage to be
consummated, or for the girl to go and live with him Needless to say,
she should pay back to the man any dower or meher she has received from
him and preferably any gifts he had given her. It has been observed
that judges in your part of the world are reluctant to grant
applications of Khula’. If this girl meets such an outnete, she should
make her application to another judge, trying to identify one who is
both broad-minded and well read. I should perhaps explain that the
judge who orders a nullification of the marriage, does not pronounce
the divorce on behalf of the man. If the woman later marries again, her
marriage is considered to be a second marriage, although she may still
be a virgin. Since the marriage has not been consummated, the woman
need not observe any waiting period after the nullification of her
marriage. From the Islamic point of view, marriage is a contractual
agreement between two parties. If either party wants to withdraw from
that contractual agreement, there are rules and procedures for such a
withdrawal. In the case of the woman, the method of Khula’ is the way
out.


Our Dialogue ( Source : Arab News – Jeddah )