Q364 :As the only breadwinner in my family, I feel
it is my obligation to repay the huge amount of debt my father incurred
to bring me up as well as my brothers and sisters. If I am to get
married, I am bound to increase my liabilities and expenses. This has
caused me to consider staying a bachelor. Is this appropriate?
A364 : It is very good of you to consider the
repayment of your father’s loan as your most immediate obligation. You
should certainly do this as fast as you can. It certainly takes top
priority. Also if you help your brothers and sisters netplete their
education, you are doing something highly beneficial for which you may
expect generous reward from God. It is true that marriage is a Sunnah
which the Prophet has emphasized as very important. A Muslim should
always keep it in mind that he will get married as soon as that is
feasible. If your circumstances make it difficult for you to get
married at present, then a delay of the marriage is reasonable. This
should not be the reason for you to take a decision that you will never
get married. What you should keep in mind is that once circumstances
allow, you will get married. You need to fulfill your immediate duties
first. Suppose, however, that the possibility of marriage presents
itself without your incurring much expenses. In this case, you may go
ahead and get married. You may also try to delay having children until
you are in better circumstances. There is nothing wrong with using a
safe contraceptive method to delay having children. What you should
guard against is a decision not to get married either in defiance of
the Prophet’s teachings or in an attempt to devote more time to
worship. In either of these cases, you are actually defying the
Prophet’s renetmendations. That is not acceptable from a Muslim.
Our Dialogue ( Source : Arab News – Jeddah )